Ten Things A Cat Thinks About


1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.
2. Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?
3. Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?
4. I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ULTERIOR motives?
5. Hmmm ... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can't we cats ever get these STUPID dogs to do anything for us?
6. This looks like a good spot for a nap.
7. Hey -- no kidding, I'm sure that's the can opener.
8. Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?
9. If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?
10. If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to let THEM know who's boss!


One night a man heard howls coming from his basement...


One night a man heard howls coming from his basement and went down to discover a female cat being raped by a mouse. Fascinated by what he saw, the man ... Read On »

There were two cats that enjoyed running together...


There were two cats that enjoyed running together. The first cat was English, called One-two-three.
The other was french and called Un-deux-trois.
... Read On »

Stuttering animal


Little Johnny is sitting in a biology class,and the teacher says that aninteresting phenomenon of nature is that only humans stutter, no otheranimal i ... Read On »

How do you make a cat drink?


How do you make a cat drink?

1 cat
2 lemons
Vodka Mix
then serve

A cat's dictionary


Purring: Sound of a cat manufacturing cuteness.
Purrverse: Poem about a strange kitty.
Purranoia: The fear that your cat is up to something.
Human ... Read On »

Sounds of the Wild


A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter.
Mother: "What does the cow say?"
Child: "Moo!"
Mother: "Great! What does the ... Read On »

Kewl Cat Quips!


- There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
- Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods...Cats have never forgotten this.
- ... Read On »

Cat Heaven


One day a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven.
Greeting him the Lord says, "You've lived a good life. If there is any way I can make your ... Read On »

Men And Cats Similar?


How are a husband and a cat similar when it comes to housework?

They're both afraid of the vacuum cleaner.

Ten Things A Cat Thinks About


1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.
2. Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?
3. Why doesn't the g ... Read On »

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